Duhh...huhuh...
Maybe I'm just really slow and y'all already thought of this, but I was just reading about Kate Moss's cocaine woes in SFgate's
"Daily Dish", and I realized that the whole scandal was started by photos run by the Daily Mirror. Get it? Cocaine? Daily
Mirror? That's retarded funny.
It's snowing in San Francisco!
Just got back from a quick jaunt over to the
ski jump on Fillmore, and it's well worth it if you can sneak away from work (or whatever it is you're pretending to be doing right now) to check it out. The jumps aren't super-spectacular, in that the angle isn't super high, so they're not able to get much air, but the event itself is spectacular. I even got snowed on. Granted it was machine-made snow, but for a robot like me that's even better than the real deal.
It's just great that we can have things like this in our city, despite rich dicks trying to spoil the fun by waving their money around angrily. Everyone was having fun, ooh-ing and aah-ing and OHHH-ing when the riders bit it and wiped out (which was the majority of the riders we saw). People of all ages - from old Chinese dudes to little kids throwing snowballs at their moms, to Marina chicks and overly-tanned dudes with their dogs - all out having a great time, behaving themselves and being respectful of the fact that we're being blessed with a special SF treat. Then you look up at these huge, multi-million dollar homes with great views and it's like, what the hell were you people complaining about?
You're filthy rich - you're not allowed to complain about squat anymore. Though it was nice to see that a few of the
richies were actually able to suck it up, get out on their roof decks and enjoy their champagne and caviar whilst watching the craziness below. That's the spirit, and I wish I knew those people (so I could be on their decks with them).
Anyhoo, if you can manage to get over there, the best views of the jumps are on vallejo, if you can get close enough. Or, walk down below the jump, like on fillmore between union & green, and watch from below. And if you can't get over there, you can watch it live
here.
Hump day linkdump
(Humpdump? Hmmm, have to chew on that one.)
Real quick, a coupla things have entered the radar:
The Billboard Liberation Front strikes again.. Oops, my bad.
Citizens for the Betterment of Billboards strikes again. Or for the first time.
It's back on!And from the department of "
Fucked up things that will bite you in Australia"...
I really think that Numark is onto something
here, but I wish they would come out with a teeny tiny one that plays only Dancehall 45s. Cuz how cute would that be?
And that is all.
(links courtesy of Jeffro,
boingboing, and
Stereogum)
"One can't complain. I have my friends. Someone spoke to me only yesterday."
Since my last post was pretty heavy, I'm gonna lighten it up a bit with a funny moment that just happened at lunch. Well, it's only funny if you know the
Barringer Brothers, but I think most of the people who read this blog do.
OK, so I'm telling B-b-b-brian and Pablo this story (originally told to me by Ding Dong) about Ross getting slapped in the face for telling a girl she looked like
Slash (nice form there, Ross), and how Ross and Ding Dong together on a bender would equal major trouble. Pablo looks ponderous for a second, and then says thoughtfully, "Hm. I like Todd," as if he were telling us which is his favorite
Ghostbuster. As if one had to choose.
Brian and I just bust out laughing, but Pablo, still pensive, adds, "He's like Eeyore." And I realize, damn, he's got a point there.
Todd is totally Eeyore, and Ross is Tigger...both equally essential and loved inhabitants of the 100 Acre Wood. Maybe this was common knowledge already, but it just struck me as a cute thought.
Internal combustion
Last night a friend of mine dropped some majorly intense-type shit on me, and I had to share it. Intense in a good way. We were enjoying a baseball game and talking about Burning Man, when my friend mentioned that this had been his most expensive Burning Man ever. Since I knew he had gone low-pro and low-budget this year, I axed why.
Let me back up for a second and say that said friend has recently gone through a really tough break-up. Six years with the same person, and then BAM (in a yucky way, not in a yummy Emeril way), right before Burning Man, everything suddenly goes sour and he's left with nada.
Back to the story at hand. This friend of mine had proposed to his (now-ex) girlfriend at the temple at Burning Man last year. This year, in the midst of the relationshit hitting the fan, he brought a little something along with him to the Temple. Something in a blue Tiffany's box, tied up with a white ribbon. He buried it in the playa dust inside the temple, and watched silently as the temple went up in flames.
That's why this was his most expensive Burning Man ever. Because he needed to burn a $3500 ring, for whatever feelings were burning inside him.
I told this story to my friend Pablo this morning and he said "that's stupid!" I disagree. I just can't help but admire the intensity of feeling and commitment to one's passion that would drive someone to follow through with something like that. Probably because I totally lack that intensity and passion most of the time. I'm just too practical, as I'm guessing a lot of us are. We might think of something like that, but then we think twice - "but it's so expensive, I could just return it." Sure you could.
And that would be infinitely more practical. But love isn't practical. And the human heart, when it has lost a great love, is pretty much the polar opposite of practical. If that's what you're feeling inside, then sometimes the only way to express it and to even begin to work it out of your system is to do something completely impulsive and irrational.
I haven't done anything like that in a long, long time. I guess it's good to be even-keeled. But every once in a while, life demands that extremity of feeling, that intense burning. Maybe that's why we keep going back to Burning Man, to drum up some internal fire?
But this post isn't about Burning Man per se. It's about
internal combustion. If you compare the human heart with an internal combustion engine, it makes sense to light your problems on fire. You got pain? You got hurt? Pack it all in and heat it up. Shit starts moving around, pressure builds, things expand, and soon, propulsion. You're moving forward. Moving on. Living again.
P.S. If you're like me, right now you're thinking "shit, so somewhere out on the open playa, there's a Tiffany's engagement ring just sitting there?!" Probably not. The burning temperature of gold is about 1945 degrees (F), diamond is about 6900 degrees. An approximate temperature of the inside of a burning house is 1200 degrees.
Practically speaking, once the box & ribbon burned, even if the ring managed to escape un-damaged by the heat, it would have been swept up with the rest of the ashes. But impractically speaking, the ring obviously burst into flame and escaped into the atmosphere as a dust angel.
Where my ladies at?
Well, one of them is in Hawaii studying hot rocks with even hotter guys. And she just sent me the link to
her blog. If you want to find out what happens when beauty and brains combine in the body of a crackwench from the dirty south, check it out.
My parents asked me yesterday what I wanted most in the world for my 30th birthday. I immediately said, a pony. They responded, "yeah, that's how we ended up living on a horse farm, you slag. No more ponies." So my second wish was for an
Ipod Nano. I've never owned an Ipod before, and I realized when I saw the new one that I had just been waiting for it to get a bit cuter first. So I went to get my ill Nano yesterday, the 4G one that holds 1,000 songs (or 6 Phish jams), and the Apple Store is sold out of them. Every time they get a shipment they are sold out within a few hours. Wait, isn't this
the Apple Store? You guys have one mission in life, to sell Apple products. Order more.
Oh well, at least Otto had sent me
this article about the Moscow Cat Circus to make me smile (this wouldn't be a GTG joint if there weren't at least one cute cat reference). Is there anything Russian animals can't do when properly "motivated?" Really there is nothing in the article to indicate that the cats in the Moscow Cat Circus are mistreated. Unless you count that look of haunted desperation in their little green eyes. And perhaps this quote:
The elder Mr. Kuklachev bridled at the idea of rewarding cats with food. "A cat is not a dog," he said. "If a cat doesn't want to do something, he will not do it."
"And besides," he added, "they work much harder if you starve them."
And finally, although I know some of you are 'omigod so totally over MIA,' here's
her cover of the Kaiser Chiefs' "Everyday I Love You Less and Less". (via
catchdubs)
If you think that we're naughty, you're right- we are!
They will know you're a pirate when they hear you say ARRRRRRRR!!
So, my last weekend was spent on a pirate ship terrorizing Lake Shasta for the occasion of ringing in Stef's and my 30th birthdays. The ship was well equipped with everything a modern day pirate needs to get by- sound system, hot tub, waterslide, grill and bar. Rather than give you a blow by blow, I'll just break down the vital statistics for you:
Mateys: 9
Wenches: 5
Scurvy dogs: 1
Ships plundered: 2
Total booty acquired: 12 eggs, 3 budweisers
Total booties shaken: 14
Sunken treasure recovered: 1 beach ball
Lashings administered: 0 (WTF?)
Injuries resulting in peg legs: 3
Wenches plundered by other boats: 1
Wenches recovered: 1
DVDs Pirated: 5
Grog consumed (and by grog, we mean Budweiser, rum, and Patron): too much to count
Decks swabbed: 0! (you bunch of drunken slobs)
As you can see, the voyage was successful. We proved that the older you get, the more advanced your pirating skills. Just wait until we turn 40!
ARRRRRR!!!
(Ship shown is not actual size, and names have been omitted to protect the innocent, er, I mean the less guilty.)
Google the word "failure"
I heart you, Google.
(Thanks, Jeffro)
Comin' down the mountain
Wanna see how we do it in the Blue Ridge Mountains without ever leaving the city? For free? Yeah, you do. I missed the
Hardly Strictly Bluegrass Festival last year, but I won't make the same mistake again.
Dad writes:
I noticed something this morning that I know you probably already know about, but just in case: The Hardly Strictly Bluegrass Festival is coming up October 1 and 2 in Golden Gate Park. After looking at the lineup, it’s killing me we can’t be out there to join you. And it’s free! Amazing! So many great people playing over 2 days, I’m sure you can’t take it all in. I hope you’re able to make it out there. In addition to the people I know you know (like Dolly, Emmylou, Gillian Welch, etc.), some people I’d recommend that you may not be familiar with are Buddy Miller, Chip Taylor & Carrie Rodriguez, Dry Branch Fire Squad, Guy Clark, Jimmie Dale Gilmore, Rhonda Vincent, Robert Keen, and Rodney Crowell. Mom is especially high* on Dry Branch, Jimmie Dale, and Rodney-in fact, she took possession of Rodney and Jimmie Dale’s new CD’s when they arrived a month ago, and I haven’t been able to wrestle them away from her yet (although she does let me listen to them on weekends!).
All that and Ralph Stanley, too! Mason jar full of moonshine optional, but highly recommended.
Thanks, Dad!
* Mom doesn't really "get high" on music. It's just an expression. She gets high on drugs, just like the rest of us. (Just kidding, Mom!**)
** Not really, though.
Blogga, please
So, I've been (rightfully) berated by some folks lately for the lack of posting. Between a downed DSL line at home (finally put right by hours of hard labor by Jeffro, my hero. FYI- he will do tech support for food.) and getting hammered like Jenna Jameson in a double feature here at work, I just haven't had the time. Wanted to remind everyone, though, that submissions are gratefully accepted here at GTG. I know some of you folks have a pretty good grasp of the English language, and others can make folks laugh their asses off even if you kant spel to gud. Drop me an email if you have something you'd like to post, or if you just have links to some good shit that you want to share with everyone.
Oh, and props to KC for posting so much lately. You're a superstar, girl.
PS- Contrary to the opinions of some who think this is "a total girlie blog" (you know who you are) men are welcome and encouraged to post. We could use some testosterone here. It has been a bit of a taco party so far.
I have a secret
Postsecret(via
Cool Hunting)
plus
My favorite
new piece of street art, on Valencia near Market (that's across from Zeitgeist for you lushes) hits
Wooster Collective.
Quotes of the WeekTM
"George Bush doesn't care about black people." (link to video
here)
--Kanye West
"Matt Damon."
--Matt Damon
Sorry for the delay in posting while I was tearing up Southern Cali with Stefbot and Babs. More on our LA adventures to come-- just as soon as the scars heal and I'm able to talk about it.
Katrina, you little bitch
She brings out the
worst in men. And the
best.
(Much respect to Michelle of
You Can't Make It Up for the Craigslist link)
PS- Obviously the second link was to highlight all of the kind souls who are opening their homes
for free to hurricane victims- not so much the "
christian family" who are trying to rent out their garage to a displaced person for $200. Jesus would be so impressed, don't you think?
