God has a plan for you
...and it doesn't involve yankin your pud all day, you sicko. Elder Ding Dong has asked that I provide you with this little tract to educate you on the evils of masturbation.
For example, if you are tempted to masturbate, think of having to bathe in a tub of worms, and eat several of them as you do the act. more
(now you know how to identify any Mormons in the room- they're the only ones who get hard- ons while watching Fear Factor)
Apparently, sex with robots is still ok. Thank you, Brother Donger.
However, God's plan does involve you eating your wheaties so that you can stay up until 3 am to catch my set at the Garage Mahal Burning Man fundraiser this Saturday night. Like that little segue into self promotion? Me too.
posted by Jess @ 11:22 AM
3 Comments:
biggup the Jess!!
i don't know...laying in a tub of worms holding my pud sounds.....well...exciting!
so, is masturbating ok if you're a robot?
mormons...there's a reason why they're only one M away from morons. dumb dumb dumb dumb dumb!
Post a Comment
<< Home